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Pasadena Divorce Attorney: Nurturing Your Children While Undergoing A Divorce

For most children, divorce can present some of the biggest changes and challenges they will ever experienced. The best thing you can do for your kids while you and your ex are divorcing is to stay fixated on their needs, and ensure as little disruption to their lives as possible. Focus as much as possible on maintaining a stable and supportive home and communicate as much as possible with your kids. Here are some things you can do to focus on your children when you’re going through a divorce:

Communication is Key in Divorce

Whether you’re going through a straight or same-sex divorce, remind your children how much you love them – and that the divorce will never change that. Constantly remind them that they had nothing to do with your decision to divorce, and it’s not anyone’s fault. If they need outside support, look into extended family, school activities, and other community support systems that can create a safe haven for them despite the divorce.

Keep the lines of communication open with your children. Let them know it’s ok to talk about their feelings, even if they are very angry or upset with the situation. Address their concerns in a meaningful way. Try to keep the information you provide specific to their age and what they are capable of understanding. Be sure you keep a united front on your answers with you ex, even if it is not an amicable divorce. You can explain more about the situation when they get older, and are better able to understand what is happening.

Resolve Custody Issues Quickly

If you are having a hard time coming to a custody agreement, a mediator may be a necessary help. If you are sharing custody, create strict routines and schedules to give your kids a sense of security and control over their time. Be consistent with rules between both homes, and allow your children to have contact with the non-resident parent when they are in your home. Always show support for your child’s relationship with the other parent and their families.

Seeking Outside Help

If you are having a hard time dealing with your child’s anger, anxiety, or other post-divorce emotions, consider seeing a therapist yourself or one for your child. Check out local resources for support groups for you or your kids such for resources here in Pasadena – or to find other parents near you going through what you’re going through. You might also find help in books written for parents and children going through a divorce.

Stay Positive

The best thing you can do for your children is to be positive about this change. No matter what feelings they are having, your children will look to you for cues on how they should react. Stay on top of managing your own stress, depression and anxiety and try not to pass it on to your children. Don’t minimize their feelings but try to focus on what is positive about the situation and focus on moving forward. Don’t blame or demonize your ex to your children. You are no longer married but you are still co-parents.

Divorce is never easy but having the right resources in place, like effective mediators and a good divorce attorney, can make the situation easier to get through. The team at Lee, Green, Stewart & Paul Attorneys at Law is experienced in all matters of divorce, custody, and child support and can help guide you through this separation process comfortably and respectfully. Contact us today for a consultation on your specific case by contacting us here.