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Transitioning: Life After Divorce Brings Big Challenges

Almost anyone who has been through a divorce will agree that it’s a difficult process. But the real challenge begins when the negotiations are over, the papers are signed, and you find yourself facing the future alone.

Whether you were married for two years or twenty, you probably became accustomed to sharing your time, space, resources, responsibilities, and future plans with your spouse. You may have moved in the same social circles and built relationships with each other’s families. If you and your spouse have children, you had someone to shoulder some of the burden, share in the parenting jobs, and take over when you couldn’t be there.

Once the divorce is final, you’re on your own again. You can no longer rely on your spouse’s income to supplement your wherewithal to live. Approximately half of your marital assets are gone with your spouse, and there is no other adult around to deal with the kids, take out the garbage, or run to the store when you’re out of milk. Not the least of the challenges you face are the emotional trauma, sense of abandonment, and self-doubt that often plague recently divorced people.

Look for the Silver Lining After Divorce

When the challenges are so overwhelming that you don’t want to get out of bed some days, it may help to focus on the positive aspects of life after divorce. The demise of a marriage can be painful, but you may find that some things get better after divorce. For example:

  • You can relax and breathe more freely at home, without the tension of a failing relationship permeating the air.
  • You can do whatever you like with your evenings and weekends, without consulting someone else’s plans or considering another person’s feelings.
  • Divorce gives you an opportunity to prove to yourself that you can handle it on your own and the self-respect that goes along with demonstrating that you can.
  • You get more quality, one-on-one time with your children after divorce.
  • You no longer have to listen to your mother or father-in-law if you choose not to do so.
  • If you have children, you typically get every other weekend off the clock, to stay out late if you like, neglect the chores and meals, and live like a someone who is single and childless for a few days every month.
  • You can make your own decisions with no need to walk on eggshells or factor in someone else’s opinion.
  • You can reinvent yourself — go to the gym, change your wardrobe and hairstyle, explore new interests, and work on becoming the strong, beautiful, independent person you’d like to be.

Pasadena Divorce Attorney

At Lee, Green, Stewart & Paul Attorneys at Law, we know how stressful the process of divorce can be and the challenges you face when it is finally over. Our Pasadena divorce attorneys are counselors and advocates for your cause. We can walk you through every step of the divorce process and help you deal with any post-divorce legal issues that arise.

Our founding attorney, Sanjay Paul, has been named among Pasadena Top Attorneys by Pasadena Magazine and nominated by Super Lawyers® as a Southern California Rising Star for 2015. Contact our office if you need a divorce lawyer in Southern California. You can rely on us for diligent representation and sound advice.